Crazy Baseball Rules

Crazy Baseball Rules: Part 1

1. Keep the seven-inning game (didn’t think I would like it but I do)

Every game has seven innings, but sometimes, the two teams decide to play nine. Guess it depends on how they feel that day.

2. Eliminate the reliever minimum batter rule

So, you"re saying that relievers can face only one hitter if the manager decides that is the best strategy? Doesn"t sound bad, until you get to Rule #3...

3. Only three relievers allowed per game(unless injury or extras during playoffs)

So, if we apply Rule #2, and use three relievers in the 6th inning, the 3rd reliever must finish the game? Seems like you want to invoke the minimum batter on him. Can he fake an injury?

4. Get rid of extras during the regular season

By extras, do you mean extra players or extra innings? What if we get rid of all the extra players and somebody gets hurt? Is that considered a forfeit?

5. Eliminate the shift both outfield and infield (this shift, in my opinion, although smart and stat driven is the reason why pure contact hitters have been tainted due to analytics. Homeruns or strikeouts are all we get)

Will we draw little circles or X"s on the field to tell players where to play? What is the penalty for being out of your spot? Or, maybe guys could try to hit the ball to the opposite field. That just might reduce home runs and strikeouts. Just saying.

Crazy Baseball Rules: Part 2

6. The strike zone is automated and a light goes off behind the hitter when it’s a strike (consistent every game all the time)

Hmmm. but how would the catcher and batter know what the call is? What if the bulb burns out? Exactly who could see the light? I am having a hard time seeing the light altogether here.

7. Keep the runner on second rule in overtime

Technically, in baseball, we don"t call it overtime. You can feel free to check out hockey, basketball, football, or Scrabble.

8. One visit to the mound by the catcher per pitcher. Per game. Period. Use it wisely.

So the pitching coach gets unlimited visits? What happens if the catcher forgets the rule and makes the forbidden second visit? Does the catcher get to make pitching changes then? Will the manager get mad at the catcher? Oh, the madness of it all!

9. Eliminate warm-up throws on the mound for relievers. Do that crap in the bullpen. When you step in the diamond it’s time to ball. Deal with it.

Yeah, that sounds fair for visiting teams. There is no way a team would make the bullpen mounds different from the pitcher"s mound on the field, right? No team has ever tried to manipulate the field to their advantage. Good call.

10. Award a base for losing a challenge in the next inning. The leadoff hitter starts on first (real consequences). No challenges by teams after the 5th inning in a 7 inning game.

Okay, is that on the very first challenge, or do managers get one freebie? And, actually, every game has seven innings (see Rule #1). Does that mean that if a manager loses a challenge in the 9th inning, the opponent"s leadoff man only gets to go to first base? Or, does he get an extra-base and start on third? Every manager should challenge in the ninth inning then. Awesome!

Crazy Baseball Rules: Part 3

11. Stealing home while the pitcher is on the mound is worth two runs.

Why stop there? If he is right-handed and is pitching from the stretch, we say it is worth three runs. In addition, if the catcher tries to pick a runner off of third, and hits him, the runner should be out. It"s similar to dodgeball. Sound fair?

12. Homeruns in extra innings are worth two runs.

How about inside-the-park home runs are worth three runs then? Or, how about this? Let"s put lines in the bleachers like the three-point line in basketball. The farther the homerun goes, the more runs the team gets. There are virtually no limits.

13. With two strikes anymore than three foul balls is the third strike.

So then we can go old school and give the batter three more bunt attempts too? That would even the playing field a little. How would you have a dropped third strike on a foul ball anyway? Could the runners still steal a base? This one is special.

14. I miss steals. Limit throws to base with runners by pitchers to three. Any more and the runner is awarded the base. (Pace of play foul)

If you want to see somebody steal, we suggest you watch Oceans 11.

15. Introduce pace of play fouls

What if there is a borderline call? Does that go to the replay officials? Will an umpire hold a big clock in his hands, so everyone can see it? Or maybe a shot clock like in basketball? This will be great with anybody who has an attention span shorter than a two-year-old. Bravo!

Crazy Baseball Rules: Part 4

16. No timeouts by hitters. Period.

But will there be a two-minute warning? How will hitters adjust their batting gloves? Do you want to just erase Mike Hargrove from the record books altogether? Does the pitcher get any timeouts? Can he call it out or will he have to signal it to the ref…er ump? Enquiring minds want to know.

17. Seven second limit outside batter"s box. Per pitch. If broken, a POP foul is a strike. Like 8 seconds rule in basketball.

Hmmm….this sounds like a timeout to us. Maybe we can let Mike Hargrove back in the game. And this ‘pop" foul thing: is it Coke, Pepsi, or does it matter?

18. A batter can switch sides of the plate during the at-bat if he chooses. So can pitchers if switching arms.

Interesting concept here. We have a question about this. In your scenario, who gets the last switch? What if it took more than seven seconds? Would the batter be banned for life for violating the seven-second rule? Would they use instant replay?

19. Universal DH

Do you mean the two teams use the same DH? Like when we were kids and one guy would be the steady pitcher? Or is it a one-size-fits-all DH? We need clarity here.

20. Replay is not done by umps on the field. A second crew of two just for replay assigned to each game ready to deliver verdict in 30 seconds or less if replay is wanted.

Hmmm….would you like to withdraw this statement? You see, umpires do not conduct replay reviews now. They are done by league officials in New York. Why would MLB hire two more people to do the review when it is already done by those in New York?

Crazy Baseball Rules

We hope that we have sufficiently responded to this person"s madness. Those sure are some crazy baseball rules. Perhaps they have inspired you to come up with your own crazy baseball rules. If you do have your own crazy baseball rules, we would sure love to poke fun at… er, uh, I mean respond intelligently to them. So, by all means, please feel free to send us your version of crazy baseball rules. Who knows, maybe we will put together our own crazy baseball rules… That only makes sense, as some days, at least a few of us could be rendered certifiably insane.

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